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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25767238">Iantosh</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nope/pseuds/Nope'>Nope</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Torchwood</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2006-12-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2006-12-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:01:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>306</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25767238</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nope/pseuds/Nope</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Emosex</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ianto Jones/Toshiko Sato</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Iantosh</h2></a>
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    <p>"Woe," said Ianto to himself. "The hideous, hideous pain." He sipped his coffee. "Woe. Sniff."</p>
<p>"Hello, Ianto," said Toshiko. "I brought you some coffee to distract me from the terrible pit of despair my life has become because my coworkers are too busy shagging furtively to pay any attention to me and my girlfriend turned out to be a homicidal non-human who my boss just killed, rather like your girlfriend actually. Crap, did I say all that out loud? Ever since the telepathy thing I can't tell any more."</p>
<p>"It's okay," said Ianto. "I can take it." He sobbed into his coffee. "I'm a manly man." Sob sob sob wah.</p>
<p>"Oh god," said Toshiko. "I think I need to compose dark poetry and cut myself, just like back in Cram School."</p>
<p>There was a crash outside. Owen and Gwen were shagging on the autopsy table again. Jack was in his office with a jar in his lap.</p>
<p>"Fuck it," said Toshiko, leaping on Ianto. Coffee spilled everywhere. Dark, bitter coffee. Made from the dregs. Because no-one had gone shopping for ages, they were too busy shagging. "Take me, Ianto. Take me now!"</p>
<p>"Where would you like to go?" Ianto asked. "I'm good at driving."</p>
<p>"I'm good at riding," said Toshiko. "But first I'd like to go down. Down like my spirit or my soul. All the way down to the bottom. Over and over and over."</p>
<p>"Right," said Ianto.</p>
<p>Tears mingling, they kissed frantically.</p>
<p>"I'm just going to call you Lisa, okay?" Ianto asked, and ripped her bra off with his teeth.</p>
<p>"Whatever," said Tosh, pulling down his boxers. "Oh, that's the stuff!"</p>
<p>"Yeah, Lisa!"</p>
<p>"Mmf, Mary! Oh, Mary!"</p>
<p>"I'm so sorry you're dead!"</p>
<p>"I'm sorry you're dead too!"</p>
<p>"Ohh! Woe! Ohhh!"</p>
<p>"Ohhhhh!"</p>
<p>"Ng!St!"</p>
<p>"Ahhhh!"</p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p>"...so, same time tomorrow?"</p>
<p>"Yeah, okay."</p>
<p>"I'll bring the coffee."</p>
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